Going to send this to some folks I know who desperately need it. They’ll read the first third, put it down and immediately text me back with a complaint about it.
Happy people are not complainers. Most people go through life saying (and in their mind thinking) I will be happy when... It could be when I graduate, when I get a job, or a raise, or when I retire, or whatever, but they always find that happiness eludes them. The future events that they believe will bring them happiness don't change their perspective on life, and as long as they complain about their present circumstances, they will never change their perspective so that they would find happiness in the here and now.
As I have pondered on what I just wrote, it seems to me that the true antidote to complaining is gratitude. Rather than focusing on all the irritations around us (they will be there regardless), turn our focus to those things for which we are grateful. As a dear friend commented many years ago, "Grateful people are happy people." And I will add that complainers never are.
There is complaining, and then there is COMPLAINING!! I've followed Dale Carnegie's advice most of my life...but I do believe what I call "mild venting" is healthy...start repressing everything and next thing you know you'll start having a mind/body issues.
Actually complaining does have a good function. It’s your brain signalling you’re in a shit situation and you want to find a better situation. The fact you complained until you were self employed may signal you never felt like you were hitting your potential as an employee. Complaints are signals to change something either for others or ourselves. It’s easy to say not to complain but I’m sure some people are more hardwired to just enjoy whatever is thrown at them whereas other people can’t do that so easily. Sure life will never be perfect but I would say if you find yourself in a post job where you are not complaining then that’s because you’ve found your sweet spot.
This post should be required reading for every developer who wants to refactor the legacy software stack "because it sucks". The road to hell my friend, and don't fix what ain't broke.
Love this blog, Jared. No complaints whatsoever.
Going to send this to some folks I know who desperately need it. They’ll read the first third, put it down and immediately text me back with a complaint about it.
Spot on Jared.
Complaining is a habit harder to kick than diet coke. And worth the effort.
-a former complainer
Happy people are not complainers. Most people go through life saying (and in their mind thinking) I will be happy when... It could be when I graduate, when I get a job, or a raise, or when I retire, or whatever, but they always find that happiness eludes them. The future events that they believe will bring them happiness don't change their perspective on life, and as long as they complain about their present circumstances, they will never change their perspective so that they would find happiness in the here and now.
As I have pondered on what I just wrote, it seems to me that the true antidote to complaining is gratitude. Rather than focusing on all the irritations around us (they will be there regardless), turn our focus to those things for which we are grateful. As a dear friend commented many years ago, "Grateful people are happy people." And I will add that complainers never are.
There is complaining, and then there is COMPLAINING!! I've followed Dale Carnegie's advice most of my life...but I do believe what I call "mild venting" is healthy...start repressing everything and next thing you know you'll start having a mind/body issues.
Actually complaining does have a good function. It’s your brain signalling you’re in a shit situation and you want to find a better situation. The fact you complained until you were self employed may signal you never felt like you were hitting your potential as an employee. Complaints are signals to change something either for others or ourselves. It’s easy to say not to complain but I’m sure some people are more hardwired to just enjoy whatever is thrown at them whereas other people can’t do that so easily. Sure life will never be perfect but I would say if you find yourself in a post job where you are not complaining then that’s because you’ve found your sweet spot.
It’s a wonderful world until you weaken. One the most important things I was taught as a young man.
This post should be required reading for every developer who wants to refactor the legacy software stack "because it sucks". The road to hell my friend, and don't fix what ain't broke.
Thanks for writing Jared.
Also like the quote from the Book of James.