When you get ticked off at someone for anything - big or small, intentional or accidental - you are giving them space in your head that is better used for other things. There are people and situations that I need to pay attention to, but that is a different category. It's never because I got upset about something they said or did, or didn't do.
My cousin did not invite me to her daughter's wedding. And went out of her way to explain why.
Good! Now I don't have to buy a wedding gift.
She is very progressive politically. My body my choice and all that. I learned from my brother that the happy couple encouraged people to donate to charity in lieu of wedding gifts. So I made a generous donation to a local charity that provides services to 'girls in trouble'.
“You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
A general life lesson from the stoics in line with your article that always gives me strength where external events have the potential to get me worked up. Thanks as always for the reminder and for the specifics to make it hit home.
Words to live by:
"Remember, and this is very important: always assume incompetence before malicious intent."
Well said, JD.
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
Hanlon's razor. Or sometimes, "Never attribute to malice what can be attributed to incompetence."
When you get ticked off at someone for anything - big or small, intentional or accidental - you are giving them space in your head that is better used for other things. There are people and situations that I need to pay attention to, but that is a different category. It's never because I got upset about something they said or did, or didn't do.
My cousin did not invite me to her daughter's wedding. And went out of her way to explain why.
Good! Now I don't have to buy a wedding gift.
She is very progressive politically. My body my choice and all that. I learned from my brother that the happy couple encouraged people to donate to charity in lieu of wedding gifts. So I made a generous donation to a local charity that provides services to 'girls in trouble'.
Then we received the nicest thank you note.
Karma. I still laugh about it..
Are you sure that's why you are still thinking about it?
It sounds to me like someone did a good job of "killing you with kindness" with that nice thank you note.
Absolutely. Karma is a bitch. I am laughing at myself. (this is a repeat because I have been quarreling with technology. Story of my life.)
“You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
A general life lesson from the stoics in line with your article that always gives me strength where external events have the potential to get me worked up. Thanks as always for the reminder and for the specifics to make it hit home.
Hostile affirmation bias has ruined a lot of relationships
Word!
Absolutely. Karma is a bitch. I am laughing at myself and the way life plays out.
well said JD, " kill them with kindness". I practise that all the time to "win friends & influence people".