Oh boy, I have my share of cringe memories. Just reading your essay brought some of them back (wince) where I made a complete idiot out of myself. It's interesting, though, that while cringe memories can be quite versatile, what brings us joy seems pretty similar. For me: 1. Giving, specifically through random acts of kindness because I see God's hand at work, using me as His "human angel" to help someone in need. I did a big thing a few weeks ago, being by happenstance exactly in the right place at exactly the right time. I actually started crying because it made me so happy that He would pick lil' old me to do this for Him. Still gives me goosebumps. 2. Gregorian chants, esp. Psalm 91 by Harpa Dei. Check it out. 3. Being out in nature on a beautiful day. Sunrises, sunsets, rainbows, dramatic cloud formations, the colors of the trees in fall, wildflowers on the side of the road, the first fresh snow that sparkles in the sunlight like diamonds, creating a winter wonderland contrasted with a deep-blue sky... there's just nothing better. 4. Being with a loved one you know so well that you can be completely yourself without fear of doing or saying something stupid. 5. Writing "in the zone" is an incredible feeling. When it happens, I will forgo food, sleep, anything, just to keep it going for as long as possible.
O.K., I came back to like/reply, reread your comment, and that generated a lot of extra thought:
2. The first thing I did was Psalm 91 by Harpa Dei: No AMSR, but very pleasant/likeable to the point of asking for several other recommendations from you; short list please?
1. Got me to thinking about the Random Acts of Kindness effects: Yes, giving is generally uplifting to the giver. But sometimes it can be counter-productive and actually NOT helpful. I personally find that Random Acts of Kindness can be somewhat euphoric when it is both appreciated and actually helpful to the recipient.
3-5: I find that cringe moments of great felt regret occurs because it is purposefully seared into memory as "Never Again", capturing a multitude of feelings/sights/sounds . AND the same thing CAN happen with euphoric events, too. I have PURPOSELY captured some "Happy Places" to revisit when I want too. Not simply good memories, but seemingly multi-sensory, in-the-zone, euphoric captured experiences. They have been particularly USEFUL in moments of great physical pain as a coping mechanism (broken arm, dislocated shoulder, dental drilling, etc)
Glad you liked the music. As for a shortlist, I'd say most things from Harpa Dei (I just love them), incl. the St. Benedict Prayer ("Crux Sacra Sit Mihi Lux"). I also love foreign-language sung prayers and psalms, like Psalm 51 in Aramaic (stunning!). Enter "Musical Aramaic rendition of the Our Father that moved the pope in Georgia" into YouTube's search for this. It's not the Our Father, it's actually Psalm 51, but that's the title anyway. If you like Fr. Seraphim and his choir, here's a whole concert: "Archimandrite Serafim & Choir Perform in Saint-Petersburg (2017)".
1. I agree, random acts of kindness should actually help someone in need, not be imposed by the "helper." I used to have this "helper syndrome" in my younger years; I'd help you whether you liked it or not and then get super resentful when people didn't reciprocate or weren't appropriately grateful. Today, I try to do good anonymously if possible, so there's none of that unhealthy attachment to emotional rewards . :)
Good stuff.....sometimes we need to just "get out of our own heads" which is the home of the ego to let joy in...music, meditation, giving, meaningful connections with others and a higher power.
Whow! Now you really got me to thinking about those personal moments that bring me goose bumps and a tear in my eye . . . a moment of euphoria . . . usually audio-video . . . of an uplifting speech, act of unusual kindness, feat of supreme prowess, etc
I have never kept track of such things, but now that I am more self-aware of this uncommon phenomenon, you bet that I will take notice.
The obverse is true, too: The cringe moments of great felt regret. These are quite different in that they get seared into the "Never Again" category. And I seriously mean that. If I even approach repeating such a moment I immediately go about correcting and apologizing with purpose!
I listened to someone recently in a podcast who said both the giver and receiver get a seratonin surge. Any time I feel really bad I get out of my funk through serving other people. The most gratifying is when I have unusual expertise that lets me help with something difficult.
Oh boy, I have my share of cringe memories. Just reading your essay brought some of them back (wince) where I made a complete idiot out of myself. It's interesting, though, that while cringe memories can be quite versatile, what brings us joy seems pretty similar. For me: 1. Giving, specifically through random acts of kindness because I see God's hand at work, using me as His "human angel" to help someone in need. I did a big thing a few weeks ago, being by happenstance exactly in the right place at exactly the right time. I actually started crying because it made me so happy that He would pick lil' old me to do this for Him. Still gives me goosebumps. 2. Gregorian chants, esp. Psalm 91 by Harpa Dei. Check it out. 3. Being out in nature on a beautiful day. Sunrises, sunsets, rainbows, dramatic cloud formations, the colors of the trees in fall, wildflowers on the side of the road, the first fresh snow that sparkles in the sunlight like diamonds, creating a winter wonderland contrasted with a deep-blue sky... there's just nothing better. 4. Being with a loved one you know so well that you can be completely yourself without fear of doing or saying something stupid. 5. Writing "in the zone" is an incredible feeling. When it happens, I will forgo food, sleep, anything, just to keep it going for as long as possible.
O.K., I came back to like/reply, reread your comment, and that generated a lot of extra thought:
2. The first thing I did was Psalm 91 by Harpa Dei: No AMSR, but very pleasant/likeable to the point of asking for several other recommendations from you; short list please?
1. Got me to thinking about the Random Acts of Kindness effects: Yes, giving is generally uplifting to the giver. But sometimes it can be counter-productive and actually NOT helpful. I personally find that Random Acts of Kindness can be somewhat euphoric when it is both appreciated and actually helpful to the recipient.
3-5: I find that cringe moments of great felt regret occurs because it is purposefully seared into memory as "Never Again", capturing a multitude of feelings/sights/sounds . AND the same thing CAN happen with euphoric events, too. I have PURPOSELY captured some "Happy Places" to revisit when I want too. Not simply good memories, but seemingly multi-sensory, in-the-zone, euphoric captured experiences. They have been particularly USEFUL in moments of great physical pain as a coping mechanism (broken arm, dislocated shoulder, dental drilling, etc)
Glad you liked the music. As for a shortlist, I'd say most things from Harpa Dei (I just love them), incl. the St. Benedict Prayer ("Crux Sacra Sit Mihi Lux"). I also love foreign-language sung prayers and psalms, like Psalm 51 in Aramaic (stunning!). Enter "Musical Aramaic rendition of the Our Father that moved the pope in Georgia" into YouTube's search for this. It's not the Our Father, it's actually Psalm 51, but that's the title anyway. If you like Fr. Seraphim and his choir, here's a whole concert: "Archimandrite Serafim & Choir Perform in Saint-Petersburg (2017)".
1. I agree, random acts of kindness should actually help someone in need, not be imposed by the "helper." I used to have this "helper syndrome" in my younger years; I'd help you whether you liked it or not and then get super resentful when people didn't reciprocate or weren't appropriately grateful. Today, I try to do good anonymously if possible, so there's none of that unhealthy attachment to emotional rewards . :)
Thanks; got the list for exploring later.
"Anonymously if possible": This actually is my primary method. Can help more people/organizations, not expecting ANYTHING in return; just HOPE.
Good stuff.....sometimes we need to just "get out of our own heads" which is the home of the ego to let joy in...music, meditation, giving, meaningful connections with others and a higher power.
I think it's God and the Universe reaching out and touching me between my shoulder blades with the music...
Whow! Now you really got me to thinking about those personal moments that bring me goose bumps and a tear in my eye . . . a moment of euphoria . . . usually audio-video . . . of an uplifting speech, act of unusual kindness, feat of supreme prowess, etc
I have never kept track of such things, but now that I am more self-aware of this uncommon phenomenon, you bet that I will take notice.
The obverse is true, too: The cringe moments of great felt regret. These are quite different in that they get seared into the "Never Again" category. And I seriously mean that. If I even approach repeating such a moment I immediately go about correcting and apologizing with purpose!
So good on you for even mentioning this!!
I listened to someone recently in a podcast who said both the giver and receiver get a seratonin surge. Any time I feel really bad I get out of my funk through serving other people. The most gratifying is when I have unusual expertise that lets me help with something difficult.